I was so full of enthusiasm and optimism and was really excited to come to this college and make ~friends~ and work hard and get on with things but now I’m starting to dread going in because it reminds me of how lame and pathetic I am
Like, I just can’t connect with other people it’s horrible. No matter how hard I try I just can’t do it. I’m starting to hate being into manga and stuff beause I never have anything to talk about to anybody and it makes me feel horrible. I know I should just man up and move on myself but it’s really not nice being an outcast where everyone else talks to each other and is friends

I’m so pathetic I hate it what’s wrong with me, why can’t I ever just fit in? Why do I have to find it so hard to just answer someone’s question?
I can’t even motivate myself and pretend like next year will be different, the people in art school will be just the same and I’ll be the same awkward, ill fitting mess I always have been.